Ahh, breastfeeding. It’s supposed to be a bonding moment, a heartwarming time, and a beautiful experience, right? Skin-to-skin contact, oxytocin flowing, looking into your little ones eyes while soft lullabies play in the background… But to be honest, sometimes it’s not really the way the world makes it out to be. And that’s okay! Nobody’s breastfeeding journey looks the same.
Sometimes, breastfeeding looks more like you sitting on the couch at 2 AM with a baby who keeps latching and unlatching like it’s an Olympic sport. Instead of feeling totally in love with the process, it can leave you feeling frustrated, overwhelmed, desperate, and even in pain! And I know that when you were picturing breastfeeding, this may not be what you had in mind.
First of all, you’re absolutely not alone. Babies latching and unlatching is common. While it’s not exactly fun for anyone, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re doing anything wrong. There are a handful of reasons why your baby might be doing the “on and off” dance, and most of them are totally fixable (or manageable).
Baby Keeps Latching And Unlatching: What Do I Do?
If your baby latches, unlatches, latches again, unlatches, cries, and repeats… you’re probably wondering why on earth this is happening. It’s important to remember that babies are still learning to coordinate sucking, swallowing, and breathing. Add in factors like slow milk flow, fast letdown, or a tricky breastfeeding position, and you’ve got a recipe for frustration and fussiness—from both parties!
The good news? This blog post is going to help you figure out why your baby latches and then pops off (again and again) while giving you strategies to survive it. We’ll cover the common reasons, solutions, and little sanity-saving tricks you can try during those challenging times.
Why Does Baby Keep Latching And Unlatching?
Babies rarely do things without a reason. If your baby keeps latching and unlatching repeatedly, there’s usually an underlying cause. Let’s take a look at some of the most common culprits:
Slow Milk Flow
Sometimes, like us, babies get impatient. If your breast milk is taking its sweet time to let down, your baby may latch, suck a few times, then get annoyed and unlatch. Imagine being super hungry and waiting at a vending machine that takes forever to drop a snack. To be fair, you’d walk away too! What can cause slow milk flow? Stress, dehydration, or just your natural letdown pattern. Babies, especially hungry ones, aren't super into waiting.
If you want a helping hand with this, check out my post: “Three Secrets To Creating A Consistent Milk Supply.”
Fast Letdown
On the flip side, if your milk flows like a fire hose, your little one may struggle to keep up. This often looks like your baby latching, gulping quickly, and unlatching to either cry or cough. They’re not trying to be dramatic; they’re just trying to breathe. This can be really common in the early weeks when your supply is still regulating.
Latch Issues
If your baby isn’t getting a good latch, they’ll often pop off in frustration. Things like a tongue-tie, lip-tie, or just being in an awkward position can make it harder for them to stay on, too. Sometimes, adjusting your angle or your baby’s range of motion can make all the difference.
If you’re feeling stuck on whether it’s a latch thing, positioning thing, or maybe even supply-related, this is where a second set of eyes helps. My 1:1 consultations are designed to take the guesswork out of it and get you some real relief.
And I get it—being patient while your little one figures out the latch can be hard, especially if you’re feeling a little sore. Nipple shields can be helpful in this case.
Silent Reflux
Silent reflux can make feeding pretty uncomfortable for babies. Instead of spitting up, babies will often unlatch repeatedly, squirm, or cry mid-feed because swallowing hurts. This one’s hard to spot, but if you notice your little one arching their back, grimacing, or fussing a lot after feeding, it could be part of the puzzle.
Gas and Burping
If your baby swallows too much air while feeding (hello again, fast letdown), they may unlatch often to deal with it. All of that extra air can lead to gassiness, fussiness, and shorter feeds. Pausing to burp your baby more often while feeding can make a huge difference—both in keeping them comfortable and reducing how much they unlatch.
Developmental Stages
Sometimes, it’s not about milk supply, reflux, or latch at all! It can really be just a phase. Around growth spurts, babies may feed more frantically, pulling on and off as your body adjusts. It doesn’t mean your milk is gone; it’s just your baby helping to boost your supply.
What To Do When Baby Keeps Unlatching And Relatching
Okay, now that we’ve covered the “why”, let’s get into the “what now.” Here are some practical ways to make things easier when your little one is latching and unlatching:
Adjust Your Position
Try switching things up when you can. Lying back while breastfeeding (or, as I like to call it, laid-back breastfeeding) can seriously help with a better letdown. On the other hand, sitting upright might encourage a stronger latch if slow milk flow is the problem. Sometimes, just a small tweak like supporting your breast differently or adjusting your baby's head can lead to a good latch that actually sticks.
Manage Milk Flow
If your milk flow is too fast, try expressing a little before latching your baby so they’re not hit with the initial rush. If your milk flows too slowly, gentle breast massage or hand expression before a feed is a great way to encourage letdown. Your milk supply will naturally adjust over time, but these hacks can make feeding sessions less stressful in the meantime.
Pause to Burp
Don’t wait until the end of the feed to burp. If your baby is unlatching repeatedly or seems fussy, stop and burp them mid-feed. It might help them get back to nursing calmly instead of popping on and off in frustration.
Keep Calm
Easier said than done, I know. However, stress can actually slow your milk letdown, making the cycle worse. Try to set yourself up in a comfortable spot, breathe, and remember–it’s not forever! My post “When Does Breastfeeding Become Easier?” can be a great resource in these moments.
Consider Reflux Support
If you suspect reflux, speak to your pediatrician or lactation consultant ASAP. Both can help rule out underlying causes and provide personalized guidance. In the meantime, keeping your baby upright during and after feeding can help. A more vertical position can reduce the chances of milk flowing back up, easing discomfort and making feeding more manageable.
Pump If Needed
If you’re feeling like feeding sessions are too chaotic or uncomfortable, remember: you don’t have to do this alone! Pumping can give your baby expressed breast milk without the stress of repetitive unlatching (and crying). If you want to figure out the best pump for your situation, check out my Pump Match Quiz. It's completely free and saves so much time. Plus, pumping is a great way to improve your nursing experience.
Don’t panic, you’ve got this!
If your baby keeps latching and unlatching, I know firsthand how defeating it can feel. You’re sitting there, postpartum, desperate for things to just work, and instead, your baby is doing gymnastics on your boob. But it’s common, and almost always temporary.
Sometimes it’s about milk flow (too fast or too slow), sometimes it’s about comfort (gas and silent reflux), and sometimes it’s about achieving a good latch and position. The important thing to remember is that you’re not broken, your baby’s not broken, and there are real, practical steps you can take to make the whole experience easier.
And if you need more than a blog post? Well, that’s where I come in! From freebies like the milk storage guide and pumping checklist, to full support inside The Ultimate Pumping Course, One With The Pump is here to make sure you don’t just survive—you THRIVE and feel empowered.
So, next time your baby latches and unlatches… take a breath. You’ve got this. And you’ve got me in your corner, too.
